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I've been thinking about zip ties too, Vik. But then I'm back to damaging the metal of the frame. A better tape job would help though. I've also been considering other solutions that aren't black, to disguise the attachment a bit. Then I go ride and forget about all of it, haha.
I wouldn't think you're a 'weirdo' for wanting a bottle inside the front triangle. You're actually totally normal and it's a fair request. I also agree and have been guilty of it in the past. I reckon frames designed first, then bottles developed to fit the design are a win for everyone. The bike engineer gets to design the bike with fewer limitations _and_ we get a place to carry a bottle. If you could have both, wouldn't you be stoked?
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