XSHIFTER will BLOW YOUR MIND!!

Words Cam McRae
Date Nov 11, 2016

This is a guaranteed GAME CHANGER. Because it seems like it must be terrible. (Hopefully Trump will follow a similar plot twist). The first clue was the video on Kickstarter that describes XSHIFTER (I keep writing X shiter for some reason which makes no sense) as “the first ever patented pending…” And that’s where I lost it and started giggling about the petty grammatical error which made me think XSHIFTER will probably be awesome. If I’m being smug about a grammatical miscue, one that is poetic in its non-linear command of tense, then I’m bound to be proven wrong and be humbled for my smugness.

paul

“Paul Gallagher, the inventor of XSHIFTER, has 30 years experience in engineering equipment for companies like HB Performance, Harley Davidson, and SRAM. He believes there is much more room for innovation in the cycling industry.” He can also speak without moving his top lip.

The video is brilliant. The black lycra, the casual yet dramatic drop of shifters and cables into the trash can, the mountain biker who looks like he’s about to do something rad… but then just pedals off on an asphalt path… It’s all there. Matt Dennison couldn’t even mock it. This is one of those cosmic jokes that keeps us humble. It reminds us that beauty and brilliance, and unintentional humour, often come from unexpected sources. And I bet Paul Gallagher (who looks like the sort of guy who had a mustache for 35 years but decided to shave it the day of the kickstarter shoot) is the nicest genius ever. He probably kicks ass on a bike as well. The classic underdog tale. So watch out. Because this can’t help but take over the world. In about three weeks you’ll wonder how you got along without it.

XSHIFTER

XSHIFTER is universal because it simply pulls cable. And yet XSHIFTER is even working on a Di2 and eTap hack.

But Patented Pending™ isn’t the end. Paul was just getting warmed up. He then tells us that “recreational professional riders can all benefit from smart shifting.” Are you KIDDING ME? I have always, always, ALWAYS wanted to be a RECREATIONAL PROFESSIONAL rider! Why do it full time? It would get so monotonous winning all those races. I’m going to be a Tour de France walk on. And then I’ll go win the World Cup overall and win Rampage in the same year. And then retire. Until the following summer. I played it back several times. That was no mistake. Paul Galagher, the nicest genius on the planet, coined a new category of rider; the RECREATIONAL PROFESSIONAL™.

He even says derailyurs. How cute is that? In another video about set up he calls the lowest gear “the biggest gear.” Adorable!

XSHIFTER

There are only four steps.

Paul’s last fully funded Kickstarter was a prosthetic tail fin for injured dolphins and orcas. Before that he made a telepathic trailer for paralyzed blind puppies. They just think about walking and the wheels begin to turn in the direction they are thinking about while keeping the wee doggies out of harm’s way. Actually it was one device – a universal device – that cures all injured baby animals. And clones them so they aren’t lonely once they are healthy again.

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Hold on though. We didn’t even get into the precision. “XSHIFTER works with any brand of derailyurs and it works with the precision of plus or minus 10 microns!!” I figured 50 microns max – but 10 MICRONS? That was enough to make me invest. I picked up one of the few remaining KICKSTARTER AMIGO | XSHIFTER DUAL pledges. For $559 US (+$20US for shipping to Canada) I get two complete XSHIFTER DUAL sets. I can give one to a friend (AMIGO!) or keep them both (they told me so). I won’t be “one of the first XSHIFTERS on the planet” but I’ll have two sets. Which is almost twice as good. Hopefully there is a t shirt included. And some stickers. I may even get a tattoo.

xshifter

For you and an amigo.

Skeptical? Look at what these fine publications said about the XSHIFTER!

Skeptical? Look at what these fine publications said about the XSHIFTER!

You may wonder why I’m so sure about this; how I know this product is about to take the world by storm. Because it’s happened before that’s how. In 2003 I received an email about a product. It was called the GRAVITY DROPER. Or at least that’s what it said in the subject line of the email. I scoffed, laughed at the typo (which was proof it was a bad idea) and reminded myself (smugly) that I was around for the Hite Rite™. I never used one of course, because lowering your saddle was for losers in the 80s and most of the 90s. And even though by 2003 I lowered my saddle all the time, I was sure the GRAVITY DROPER was a terrible idea. I didn’t completely nail that one so that’s how I’m sure. And by the way, XSHIFTER can even operate your dropper post. I have no idea how but if Paul can heal blind puppies, droppers are child’s play.

XSHIFTER

If you “press and hold” XSHIFTER will change “two or three gears” because randomness is part of the beauty of mountain biking.

Everyone at NSMB.com, even the people who don’t know about this yet, would like to wish Paul and the XSHIFTER Kickstarter the best of luck. Which won’t be hard because it’s already over 150% funded. In all sincerity though, I think it’s amazing when people throw their hat over the fence and create something new. I’ll be rooting for the XSHITER after missing the boat on the GRAVITY DROPER.

GODSPEED XSHIFTER!

What are you still doing here? Get over to the XSHIFTER Kickstarter page and start pledging like you just don’t care!


Which pledge package did you pick up?

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Comments

frank-borstelmann
0
Frank Borstelmann  - Feb. 11, 2017, 7:13 a.m.

Is thre ny way to fit it on a Rohloff 14 sped

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paul-gallagher
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Paul Gallagher  - Nov. 19, 2016, 3:24 a.m.

Loved reading this article, although I'm a bit embarrassed also. Yes, we are a Kickstarter project, so don't have a big budget. I guess that shows in the video and some of our other marketing. Doing the best we can for a $100 budget. 🙂 I do have to thank Cam, because believe it or not, we actually picked up a few pledges from here. I'm more than happy to talk to anyone and answer questions. This really is a very unique product that is filling a very large gap in the industry. It can do more than I can practically talk about here. My email is paulg@xshifter.com

Reply

cam@nsmb.com
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Cam McRae  - Feb. 9, 2017, 2:25 p.m.

Glad to hear it Paul! Best of luck to you. And thanks for having a sense of humour!

Reply

rvoi
0
rvoi  - Nov. 13, 2016, 1:42 p.m.

99% as fast as a cable and uses batteries like di2 so really no reason not to use it… hooray!

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rb-biscayda
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Rb Biscayda  - Nov. 13, 2016, 3:14 a.m.

it would be fun to mount it somewhere near the front of the frame

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cam@nsmb.com
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Cam McRae  - Nov. 14, 2016, 9:46 p.m.

Right near the shifter?

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0
49%  - Nov. 11, 2016, 6:32 p.m.

Yeah, but I heard the YSHIFTER is already in the pipe and is accurate to within 8 parsecs. And btw is totally incompatible with anything 10 parsec.

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cam@nsmb.com
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Cam McRae  - Nov. 11, 2016, 10:53 a.m.

I'm most excited about being a RECREATIONAL PROFESSIONAL™.

Reply

poo-stance
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Poo Stance  - Nov. 11, 2016, 10:38 a.m.

Unsure if you just mocked this guy for an entire article or are genuinely supporting his product…

Reply

cam@nsmb.com
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Cam McRae  - Nov. 11, 2016, 10:39 a.m.

Perfect.

Reply

poo-stance
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Poo Stance  - Nov. 14, 2016, 12:41 p.m.

The troll is now being trolled…

But for reals. Many a good product lacks the initial funding to produce a solid sales pitch video complete with IFHT production and scripted audio.

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cam@nsmb.com
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Cam McRae  - Nov. 14, 2016, 3:45 p.m.

That's one of the points I made isn't it?

Reply

craw
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Cr4w  - Nov. 11, 2016, 9:37 a.m.

I had a Hite Rite. Still have it in a bin somewhere. I'll start the bidding at 10 microns.

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john-utah
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John Utah  - Nov. 12, 2016, 11:06 a.m.

holy crap I had one too! I still have my odyysea areator seatpost pump. Still works great…

Reply

andy-eunson
0
Andy Eunson  - Nov. 12, 2016, 1:08 p.m.

Pffffft. I have a Race Hite. In black. All the drop you need for XC and no more.

Reply

extraspecialandbitter
0
ExtraSpecialandBitter  - Nov. 11, 2016, 8:11 a.m.

$239! That's more expensive than A mountan bikes with a Shox.

Reply

christian-samuelsen
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Christian Samuelsen  - Nov. 11, 2016, 7:41 a.m.

Is this going to be another one of those "Stan's Tubeless for road" things that all of the media gets all hyped up about and then ends up being nothing because no one in the right mind would pay an additional $600 for cable actuated derailleurs?

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cam@nsmb.com
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Cam McRae  - Nov. 11, 2016, 10:39 a.m.

TBF $539 gets you TWO complete sets. One for you and one for your AMIGO. But you are allowed to keep both apparently.

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christian-samuelsen
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Christian Samuelsen  - Nov. 11, 2016, 12:48 p.m.

PLUS the $0.73 dollar exchange rate gets you a real world cost of $753 CAD…..plus customs and duties fees since I assume those are not covered.

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0
uncle duke  - Nov. 11, 2016, 5:40 a.m.

10 microns is pretty good…

Reply

Vikb
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Vik Banerjee  - Nov. 11, 2016, 6:54 a.m.

10 microns is okay, but my buddy Han did the Kessel Run in 6 microns.

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uncle duke  - Nov. 11, 2016, 10:10 a.m.

not bad…

Reply

cam@nsmb.com
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Cam McRae  - Nov. 11, 2016, 10:38 a.m.

How many parsecs are we talking?

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Vikb
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Vik Banerjee  - Nov. 11, 2016, 10:50 a.m.

Sorry I don't know Imperial units.

Reply

kos
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Kos  - Nov. 11, 2016, 8:26 p.m.

Where did that land him on The Straw Vah?!

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