Comic
The Eternal Granola Bar
I was cleaning out my pack last week when I stumbled on an ancient granola bar. It was so old that initially considered calling an archeologist to examine its providence, but instead, I decided to invent my own mythology for it.
Scroll for the entire story.
Do you have a questionable snack that's been in your pack for too long? Maybe a half-eaten bag of gummy worms, or a Snickers that's melted flat? Don't throw them out, they might be good luck charms!
Comments
Andeh
1 month, 1 week ago
Schroedinger's granola bar: it is both edible and expired until you open the wrapper.
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XexiXeko
1 month, 1 week ago
When I was a teenager I always had an eternal condom in my wallet...
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Pete Roggeman
1 month, 1 week ago
Found a banana once, buried at the bottom of a riding bag. It was not a fresh banana. It was also not, however, a rotten banana. It aged into mostly blackness and then, somehow, resisted the onslaught of time. Petrified Banana!
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Cy Whitling
1 month, 1 week ago
I did this in my school locker in 4th grade. The results were revolting.
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Pete Roggeman
1 month, 1 week ago
Mine was anything but revolting. Also anything but edible. Never seen anything like it.
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Velocipedestrian
1 month, 1 week ago
I ate mine a couple of weeks ago!
Better get a replacement to start the curing process stat.
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Cooper Quinn
1 month, 1 week ago
Obligatory:
https://slate.com/human-interest/2018/04/nature-valley-granola-bar-crumb-free-eating-methods-as-explained-by-nature-valley.html
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johnoble
1 month, 1 week ago
I once managed to double flat on a mosquito infested ride route, fortunately only 10km or so from home. My 5 year old emotional support clif bar saved me that day, holding off the bonk as I jogged just fast enough to keep the bugs off me and get home.
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ultimatist
1 month, 1 week ago
Funny, I have THAT EXACT bar in my bag. Kids got tired of eating "the gravel bar" and we got tired of cleaning up after. It's truly a frag grenade when opened. Some say it beats D3O in force absorption...
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DanL
1 month, 1 week ago
I found some absolutely rock hard gummy worms in my snowboard bag, which were the reward for my kids when waiting in lift lines. Impossible to chew.
I haven't had a nature valley bar fro a long time. I can feel the crumbs already.
Dust-wind-dude
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Cy Whitling
1 month, 1 week ago
My favorite is opening day candy that's just petrified closing day candy that I never cleaned out of my ski coat.
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Pete Roggeman
1 month, 1 week ago
My favourite is candy.
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GrundleJ
1 month, 1 week ago
I had the same bar in my backpack. It wasn't really a riding pack, though it did go with me on a few occasions, but it was literally the same brand, flavor and color granola bar. I think I threw it away when I got a new pack. Maybe that's where my skills went!
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Mammal
1 month, 1 week ago
This is such a universal truth. I also have a small stash in my car that gets used more often, so I try to swap out Pack Bars for Car Bars every so often to keep things within the year-old relm.
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